Direction and focus should be my main priority after God and children. Some days are easy, some days are a bit more difficult.
You see, for the past couple of years I have been searching...for my relationship with Jesus again, love, and most of all myself. I thought I had found what I knew was well on my way to being the best I could be a few years ago, but I was going about it in too extreme a manner.
Basically the past couple of years or so I have been on a downward spiral to nowhere, and finding myself crawling out of an empty well of useless promises and wishes so that I can wash off, clean my scrapes, and mend my bruises.
Thank God for friends who came into my life when they did. I believe wholeheartedly that the positives will eventually outweigh the negatives, and everything will be mended and fresh.
It would be too easy for me to take the negative, roll with it, and act as if I'm a victim in the situations I've gotten myself into. I have to step back and realize I'm not a victim. Okay,I could have chosen not to trust so much, but you know what? The problem with that rationale is I should have trusted MYSELF.
I am to a point now where I am hell bent on staying focused, and getting done what needs to be done for myself and my children.
God is all loving, all forgiving, and AMAZING! He is helping me take the steps needed to find him again, this time without going too far to the left or the right. :-)
